Okay so I am not going to try and hide it and come out and say I definitely had post-vacation depression Friday and Saturday after coming back from the most lovely coast in America. (not serious clinical depression but I was bummed, which is out of the ordinary for me) There is no way to express how much I adore the west coast, its mountains, its rocks, its people, its cities, its weather, its vibes. It calls my name. It felt completely unreal. Ever since I visited Oregon in 2012, the west coast has all been a dream to me. I dream about it all the time. I crave for it as I double tap the PNW photos scrolling through my Instagram. So when I was finally able to live that life again.. I swore I was in a dream. I was. But it was real life. It reminded me of the wonderful things that are ahead. Continue reading
Happy Try-day Friday everyone!
What’s Try-day Friday, you might ask? Well, read along to find out! Continue reading
Wow. A year ago today I moved to Fayetteville. This image was taken on my way there (well, here). It was quite the day. It was a Sunday. A day I would visit with my church leaders, my best friends, my family, and see my little sister get baptized. I moved up here with no clue what God was going to do. No idea who He would put in my path. No idea how to get around town. No idea how I would like my classes or my major. No idea if I would even make it. I cried and prayed the whole 6 hours up here. I knew He wanted to do big things through me. The word He has in my heart was “leadership.” I am nothing without Him. I wouldn’t be in Fayetteville if He didn’t lead me here. It was me + Him. I had no other option. Some of you know what that’s like.
A year later I have the best community, just like I prayed for. I have wonderful leaders, just like I prayed for. I have a peace in my heart just like I prayed for. God has MOVED, just like I prayed for. I go to the best school. I live in the best city. I fell in love after I moved, and continue to every day. I have encountered seasons I never knew I would. I have encountered Jesus like I never knew I would. I seriously cannot explain all that has happened in the past year except that it was extreme progression in such a beautiful way. The Lord is SO GOOD. I will never stop sharing His goodness. GLORY TO GLORY!
I have truly learned trust, confidence, self-discipline, boundaries, and FAITH. I learned that the Lord promises me (and you) that He will be with me wherever I go. I learned that it is OK to cut off some toxic things in your life, even if it means you are “alone” – if it means you are getting closer to God. Progression doesn’t always look like people are with you. People will leave you behind and you will have to leave people behind, those who pull you backward. I learned that private devotion is everything. My private devotion earned more reward (eternal) than a million people’s approval would. I learned to trust God with HIS decision – it was a time no one else could make a decision for me. I learned to TRUST without ANY backup plans. Like for real. There was no time that could be wasted, because it was all already wasted. There was no “well, if this option didn’t work out, I always have this.” No. It was “I have NO options but TRUST.” I had no clue what He would do. Trust + nothing. He broke perfectionism – I no longer need everyone to like me. I have learned so much more but where is intimacy with God if all of your experiences are scattered for all to see?
There were so many reasons that I could not be here. I tried to convince myself so many times that I must have misheard from the Lord and that He wasn’t calling me here. That He could not change a city through one person. That I could not be an effective leader like He called me to be. That a community was too much to ask for… But that’s not the God we serve!!! We serve a God who gives us life ABUNDANT. And sometimes we have to go through what seems like hell to get there. You have to go through the valley to get to the mountaintop. He taught me that we experience tremendous pain before we experience breakthrough. The TRUTH is – He called me once, He will pull through. I am one person and He can change a world through MANY “one persons” saying YES to Him (community). He knows community is essential and will not let us go through life alone! He created us all to be leaders, which are learners & followers of Him but they bring others with them. Leadership doesn’t always look like your church leaders asking you to be in a leadership position.
I’ve learned so much and my life right now is ONLY a testimony of Him. Thank you to all of you who told me to keep pushing through. Those of you who shared your experiences to help me through. Those who were CONSTANT encouragers. Those who answered stress-filled phone calls and still spoke TRUTH into my life. Those of you at home who made a valiant effort for our friendship. It is TOUGH moving out on your own. And it takes a while for you to find your true spot. But the process is not meant to be rushed! His timing is perfect.
Please let this encourage you. I know there are many people out there going through the same thing I did, and those of you who are about to or will in the future. I have learned so much. I want my experiences to teach and help those to go through their tough seasons in a more confident way. It may not make it easier but there is HOPE on the horizon.
Love y’all. Thanks to those of you who made it through this entire post.
I took an hour & a half drive tonight just to rest with the Lord.
As I was driving, I was listening to a good song but I kept going through my music just to find another song… I had a good song playing but I could not enjoy the current song because I was flipping through, looking for other songs. The Lord spoke this to me: I am looking for another way instead of just enjoying the way I already have. Instead of enjoying what He has already given me. Instead of enjoying His way. Instead of enjoying what He is doing already.
We miss out on enjoying what He is doing currently because we are so busy looking in the world for more tangible answers.
When we say, “Take me to deeper places, God; send me, Lord” we are literally inviting Him to bring us to our fears in order for Him to conquer them. In order for His strength and power to shine through our weakness. Our weakness / fear is the very thing He’s calling us to address and let His spirit conquer. Whatever light avoids, darkness invades. If we don’t let His light burst through our dark, fearful places, darkness will keep flooding through.
We as believers get to rest in knowing that however many times we say, “but Lord I’m scared” He says, “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”
He says, “If only you could see it through my eyes.” I imagine our situation would seem small, then, compared to His love for us.
The more I find myself, the more I find God.
Genesis 1:27 “so God created man in His own image.”
Today I began to wonder why I felt so much closer to God as I was reading this women empowerment book. I was feeling so strong about who God created me to be. I began to wonder if it was selfish to feel this way. But I pointed everything to God. To His glory. To His kingdom.
I could feel my faith increasing and my spirit stirring inside of me. I felt that through the words I was reading, God was declaring His purpose over me. And that excites me!! The more I was discovering who God was/is calling me to be, the more intimate I felt our relationship was.
Does this mean at other times God and I are less intimate? Does this mean that we are not as close? Does this mean that He’s not working as much?
It was only my realization and change of perspective. Realizing how truly close the Holy Spirit is at all times. And how close God truly is. And how His spirit has always been stirring boldness and empowerment me. And I’m gonna let Him bring it out.
This is only part of my journal excerpt from today. I believe that God gave me the motivation to write my personal experiences in order to share it with others, so the excerpt I give you, world.
PTL = Praise the Lord
Confession: I don’t really like coffee pictures… But hey, at least I didn’t use the P5 VSCO filter for it.
Hi loves, happy Wednesday. I just want to share something I learned within a span of like 30 minutes and I think will encourage you all. It’s not very long, check it out x Continue reading
Yo! Happy Wednesday everyone!
I hope you are all out to a great start for your Wednesday. I know my Louisiana folks are glad to be out of school but bummed their backyard is a dirty swimming pool! It’s raining in Fayetteville all week too, and this weekend I’m traveling! So prayerfully everything goes smoothly – I know He’s got my back though!
I just wanted to upload this blog post announcing that I have just received this “Living Proof” shampoo, conditioner, and overnight perfector in the mail today! I have wanted to try a new shampoo that is healthier for my hair and I read a few blogs and watched a few videos on Living Proof products. Jennifer Aniston uses this brand! For some of us, that is all we need to hear. I ordered the tiny 2 ounces to start out with ($20 later). They also threw in a free sample of this night cap overnight perfector! I’m super excited to try these products. Apparently their products (and I hear especially their dry shampoo) take so good care of your hair that even Jennifer Aniston has gone days without washing her hair! Crazy stuff, I’m ready to try it out. I am not sure how far 2 ounces will get me, though. I honestly don’t know if this is enough for me to start seeing a change in my hair or not but I am going for it! I can’t wait to tell you all the details of how this shampoo/conditioner works for me. I hope it works really well. The downside of it, though, is if I do fall in love with this product, it will be an expensive buy for me to keep up with my hair. But, if I’m only using it every other day or so, maybe it won’t seem too bad. I am starting tomorrow, so as soon as I start to see a difference, I will update y’all! Continue reading